The Power of Small Groups: Building Real Community in a Digital World
Why We Need Campfire Experiences
We already know that people have gathered around campfires to share stories, and build the relationships that matter for millennia. The intimacy of the circle, and the absence of distractions created a space where people could see and hear one another.
The need for spaces where we can grow trust and admiration and recognize when we're understood both intellectually and emotionally continues. I call these experiences where we offer this again “Campfire Experience.”
They certainly are not an innovation—they are a return to something ancient and essential.
What Makes a Campfire Experience Work?
A true Campfire Experience—whether virtual or in-person—meets three key criteria:
1. Proximity Matters (Even Virtually)
In-person, this means people are physically close enough to have a possible intimate conversation. Virtually, it means ensuring small enough groups that possible vulnerable conversations can happen.
2. Permission to Have a Conversation We Want
Participants need freedom to have the conversations they want to have. We need time and permission to explore the topics and priorities that matter to us.
3. Eliminate Conditions that Distract from the Conversations
Imagine trying to connect while someone blasts a TV, sells raffle tickets, or runs a loud stage show in the space. This experience doesn't count. A Campfire Experience removes distractions so people can focus on each other.
The Virtual Campfire: Making It Work Online
When Google experimented with bringing thought leaders together virtually, they applied these principles. Instead of large gatherings, where everyone could hear and interrupt big conversations, Google set up online meetings:
Kept groups to five or fewer people
Allowed conversations to flow from a prompt without rigid structure
Minimized distractions so people could fully focus
The results were surprising. Even on video calls reported a deep feeling of connection. Many even described their new friends as a “professional family.”
Contrast this with another tech company that tried what they thought was a similar strategy but considered their ‘small groups’ 15 people. Participants didn't even want to return. And I don't know anyone who would.
With so many participants, meaningful conversation became impossible. The lesson... small is better.
Applying This to Your Virtual Gatherings
If you want to build real connections in a virtual setting, remember:
Small groups provide rewarding opportunity. Keep it to five or fewer.
Trust the conversation will develop with enough time. You don’t need entertainment—people will open up if given an intentional space.
Remove distractions. Set the space for focus and intimacy.
In a world where people crave belonging, creating a Campfire Experience—online or in-person—might be the most precious time you can offer.
Get free resources on building the community you long for at www.charlesvogl.com
